You see, i am a chinese dude...from my early age till now, i had been taught to clean my a$$ with water after ban sai and wipe it dry with tissues. For me this is hygenic..no matter how you clean your a$$ with tissues, the shit smell and stain will still be there.

for the past 10 years, i mostly dated malay girls and this is because i am pretty much like a malay compare to chinese. Malay chicks much hygenic, well shave and well groom.

lately i realize i need to settle down and stop fooling around and so i met a lady, chinese lady la...very young...7 years younger than me la. after a while i try to cope with this chinese shitty stuffs like visit her parents and do this lantern shit eat kuih bulan (taste like shit more than bulan, dun lie..i know how shit taste like).

one day we decided to have sex. as usual 69 come first after foreplay...my god before my mouth come close to her kerang (siham), i bounch back immediately cause got this very heavy expired shit smell...so this biatch must be cleaning her ass with tissues nia...

i wanna break up with her liao cause i cannot tahan this chinese way of cleaning a$$, for me must use water to remove stain and smell!! can't deny she been very nice to me, breaking up with her over a$$-cleaning-methodology is just so lame. but i love 69 and i hate shit smell!!

To you all chinese biatches out there, clean your a$$ with water and wipe it dry with tissues la...

I'm starting to like this Lowyat website la... First the "Outside" game, then the hantu touch this one guy's tummy and now this.

    Here's the irony. Yee Soon wants me to teach him how to study, and yet he keeps making remarks about me and Siew Fai (being a couple). And what's worse, the rest of the guys are following suit. This is why I believe in karma when he lost his *ahem ahem* while sleeping in class.

    But what I found out recently was even more shocking. He made a remark that I give very good love advice. When I looked back at my previous posts, I really don't find so. Perhaps I realize something that they weren't able to see or thought about this issues thoroughly.

    So I'll just write something simple about romance... and... I dunno. I'll just go with the flow, I guess.

    I really envy girls a lot, and the part I'm most jealous about them is not attraction (girls have better attributes in that, but guys can have it too. namely money. =X) but their intuition. It's almost like having spider senses, and they can avoid danger when necessary. You'll see what I mean later.

    When a guy likes a girl (prob due to this "attraction" factor), guys are very bad at hiding it. They stop acting like themselves. They start doing weird things. They get distracted easily. So for example, if it was Siew Fai, I can tell the symptoms within 2 weeks. For any other guy, probably a month. But if you ask Li San or Su Yi, they can catch on faster than me, and for the girl who's being chased, knows instantly.

    So... great, now the girl knows! What will happen? For a girl, it's simple for her to reject him instantly. And he can't deny it because he's just so damn obvious. The guy will be pissed for a while by her approach, but it's for the better of the human race. WHAT WOULD REALLY SUCK is if she continues to lead you on, or rather ignore the signs... After all, the guy's trying to lure the girl's heart. She has nothing to lose, and everything to gain.

    Now let's try reverse role. For one, for the girl to be chasing after the guy, she'll have to either desperate or ultimately lovestrucked by the guy (looks, charisma or wallet). In normal circumstances, she wouldn't admit it and you can't force her into confessing (that's just not how things roll). Plus you don't want to sound like a complete perasan case ("Oh I know you're in love with me", and she gives you the blur look), so you really can't do anything about it. You may assume that you're leading her on, but like I said earlier, the girl really has nothing to lose. Once she finds out you're not interested, she'll stop latching. (but I can't really say the same applies with the reverse...)

    Of course, being in a relationship is all about loving each other, and not bertepuk sebelah tangan aje. The solution? Give yourself 1 month before confessing. If you're sure you're still interested in her, then it isn't lust. Guys will still have to confess first (it's called chivalry, i guess), and girls will accept or reject. It sucks to be rejected, but hey, at least you're not taken for a joy ride.

Have you ever heard of fishermen who brag about how big their catch is? Like they're just elaborating the size of their catch, or just simply bragging their brilliant technique into catching these fishes? I'm quite sick of it, even though I never really know whether they're telling their truth or not (rather, i'll just give them the benefit of the doubt), but the real issue is when they turn out to be my friend.

Before I make anyone excited (or offended, depending who reads this), I'm referring to my primary school friends. When we were still young, we definitely never talked about it. But after years not contacting one another, the first thing that comes to our mind would be asking whether they got a partner or not (mainly because it excites them talking about it, not because all guys are shallow and narrow-minded).

Apparently, the trend is NOT to have a partner, but instead it's a matter of how many of these girls have you dated. They would tell you how "beautiful" their "catch" was, and how easy it is to set the "bait" and soon enough these "fishes" will be "caught". And when I tell them that I don't have a girlfriend (which means I haven't dated a few either), these "fishermen" would tell you how you should always "catch" the easy one first. It's like telling me to "catch" the "fish" with one "fin" only... -__-

Anyway, I met up with one guy from primary school recently, and he was telling me how you should treat the girl, then the girl would only see you as a prospect boyfriend, which was followed by a series of his colorful experience with college girls and even a Thai masseuse. O_O

So today, I thought it would be okay for me and my female classmate to sit next to him so that we can revise. Next thing I know, he's trying to work his magic on her. I got really worried, because technically I just handed my classmate on a silver platter to a hungry "wolf"... O_O

Anyway, if that was the way he "catches" his "fishes", I would be absolutely convinced that he's lying. The way he was looking at my classmate... was just downright perverted. =(

I dunno why recently I've been crazy over honeydew. It's just like that time I was crazy over the thought whether Judge Pao was really Chinese. In my house, my dad loves to eat papaya while my mum likes to eat bananas. Since they're the one buying the fruits, it's insane to eat papaya and bananas everyday (i feel a song coming on... -__-). Anyway, I gotten to like melons for some strange reason (don't think of perverted thoughts plz. ;D) such as watermelon, wintermelon and honeydew (melon. =X), although I like apples too. LOL.

It started with buying a honeydew mooncake, then my mum mysteriously bought a honeydew, then I went to Dragon-I and ate honeydew dessert, and lastly I went to Monash and drank honeydew bubble tea. =3 It's crazy, I know but there's something oddly nice about honeydew, because somehow all my friends wish they could eat one too. xD

Anyway, from Wikipedia, I didn't find out whether they grow just like watermelons do, or whether they're grown in Malaysia (because obviously I've never seen a honeydew plantation before...), but I found out that honeydews are known in China as... Wallace. (I'm not kidding, read the article.)

Su Yi, I want to eat Wallace plz!! LOL

Prologue: I'M DAMN LAZY TO COLOUR THIS POST!

    I had pretty decided that I should give up attending audit clases. After all, it was the last class before the mock exams. Even though it's the last one, I know she had covered all the topics that she think will make her pass. Everyone knows they're going to fail under her. And what makes this so awesome is that you're ALWAYS be stuck with her.

    I had played the laptop the previous night. I hadn't play for the entire day, and Valencia was beating my team, Real Madrid in the league title. It was technically just calling my name. I played until 6am. =X Then I left the house at 8.15am. Custom time for Tuesday, I would say.

    I ended up sleeping in the library until people started to look weird. I imagined a person bringing a violin. I thought I saw someone bringing their 1 year-old child to the library. It sucked to be insomniac, especially when pimples starts growing in places that causes difficulty sitting down. T_T

    As I was sitting in the library, I realized something remarkably true. Every single girl dress code was starting to be predictable, but I don't have to tell you that. I bet you already know that almost every girl has the "if you have it, you flaunt it. if you don't, you hide it" principle when it comes to showing up in college every day. And the thing is that, if they don't dress that way and the girl doesn't have enough feminine features, I can't really tell her gender. =X

    Marianne is still acting like a freaking ninja. One moment I see her in the library, and the next I can't even find her in any part of the library at all. Anyway, I found her sitting with Vi Vian and scared the hell out of her again. How she has a bf is just another evidence that guys just technically date anyone they can get their hands to. When I mentioned him to tease her, she just puts on that *unexplainable* look on her face. At one point, I was really interested in knowing who the guy was (which I did), but my investigation went haywire when I found out she has multiple boyfriends (which didn't make sense to me, because Marianne doesn't look like a player. =O)

    Went to chanting class. The VU teacher, who's our advising teacher brought in his fellow colleague and somehow today I was able to keep up with the speed. I even notice if I can't catch up with them, I'll never be able to get back in... So I started to mumble whatever I was looking at (even it was probably wrong). Lol. Anyway, his colleague couldn't keep up. Understandable since it's her first time.